For a while now I've been looking for succinct and clear ways to describe how me and Mrs Jockmcgonzo felt at points with regards to our church for me it was both before and after we lost our little girl. and along comes jon birch and does it easily.
When i was having panic attacks in church and couldn't stay in the meetings i was told to get over it.
only a month after we'd been through hell and lost our baby girl we were effectively asked why weren't we over it.
even now when to the vast extent i am as 'over it' as I'm ever going to be people still seem uncomfortable when i talk about her or when i talk about issues i have with the church and they tend to lump it all under the umbrella of "not over it yet"
and one more thing, i will never be over losing my little girl, i will be able to carry on, i will be able to see the blessings that I've been given, i will be able to rejoice in our healthy happy little boy, i suspect i even may one day be able to enjoy going to church again BUT I WILL NEVER stop missing her or talking about her and if this is what you expect to see from me before i reach your criteria of being 'over it' then walk up to me the next time you see me and say goodbye because it isn't going to happen. However i do want to stress that this doesn't mean I'm hung up on what happened or can't move past it just that she was a huge and important part of my life and that period of time will always be the time that who i was changed.
Posted via email from Chris's posterous
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